Croxley Ales

Croxley Ales Front

What started as a quest for a SICK wing special ended up being a quest for an even SICKER burger. For those not in the know, Croxley Ales on Ave. B (near 3rd) is the home of the 10 cent wings (Mon-Wed). I arrived as a skeptic for a couple of reasons - 1) that's too good to be true 2) the wings must be as tiny as popcorn chicken 3) there's gotta be a catch, there's ALWAYS a catch. Much to my surprise, this was not too good to be true, the chicken wings were big, not Dallas BBQ BIG but still a big wing, and there is no catch. Well, not really. If you consider buying a minimum of 15 wings a catch, well then they got you! Buy 15 and spend a buck fifty or ELSE! The wings alone are worth the voyage. Heck, the wings are worth more than they're charging but I am NEVER going to complain about wanting to pay more for something. Great wings at an even better price and the place is loaded with TVs to watch the game, TMZ, Golden Girls, whatevs.

But you're saying, what about this burger you speak of. Welllllll kids, lemme tell you about this burger known as "The What The S*?!" burger which is your typical 8oz burger with lettuce, tomato, and onion.

You say, "What's the big deal DJ?"
I say, "There's no bun!" 
You say, "Carb conscious all of the sudden?"
I say, "Nope, who needs a bun when you can put this burger between not 1, but 2 grilled cheese sandwiches?"
You say, "I wish I was your cardiologist b/c your heart's gotta blow sooner, not later."
I just laugh in your face.

Croxley Wings!

Now there are a number of other wild concoctions on the burger front and I promise to do more burgers and less wings next time so that I can maybe tame a pair of wild beasts (the Triple Threat - topped w/bacon, cheddar, pulled pork and the Mac Daddy - topped w/Mac N Cheese come to mind). The waitress was kinda rooting against me finishing my burger, said she's only seen 1 person do it and eat all the fries. I told her I don't eat fries and she rolled her eyes. My boy stands up and says "dude ate 15 wings" she seemed apathetic. I'll show her. One day she'll be proud of me.

The What the Burger!

On the real though, the burger is kinda flavorless. Maybe it was flavor overload? Maybe I was in a state of delirium with all the chickens and grilled cheesy goodness running through my system. But if I use some ketchup, the burger definitely needed some help when there was no more lettuce, tomato, or onion to save it. Sorry Louis, I didn't mean to do it!

Rating - 4/5 - this is a big burger, needs some flavor. Meat was fresh, not frozen. Cooked to perfection so I can't complain. But with all the options, I feel like I'm rating one and Croxley deserves a better fate because the burgers are stand out and the wings are spectacular!

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Mel's Burger Bar

Mel's Burger Bar - Al Fresco

Oh the Upper West Side. Where do you really begin and end? I mean, by real standards and not real estate standards. I don't gauge the boundaries of this neighborhood by the insane costs of rent to live on top of people but more so on the rotten summer stank on the 1 train as you cruise up Broadway. I have a certain disdain for the waft of hot, dank air that blows into the air conditioned train cart at each passing stop and when you hit 96th, you know you're either ready to a) get off the train and just hoof it b) spray some type of deodorant to neutralize the funk in the air or c) put on a gas mask and enjoy the rest of the ride.

I had the recent pleasure of riding the 1 up to 110th to hit up Mel's, who offers a wide variety of burgers and shakes (Cookie Monster - ahem, Big Daddy's clone, PBJ, Smores, etc.), along with a handful of interesting starters (fried pickles, buffalo wings, brisket chili). The burger of choice for me was "The Original" because I kinda liked the nod on the menu that read "Thank You Louis." A nod to Louis Lunch over in New Haven that I thought warranted giving the burger a shot. For the record, I did not think it was going to replicate what LL has been doing for 115 years in any way other than slapping the burger sandwich on toast. A true LL fan like myself can also tell you that the obvious omission of the cheese spread left the sandwich lacking a little flavor (not just because they forgot my onion). Overall the burger was good. The girl was seemingly intent on giving me a medium burger, and I quote "is medium ok." To which I replied, nope. Gimme mine mooing and I'll take care of the rest.

Mel's Burger Bar - The Original

Overall the burger was good. The meat was really just meat. Black Angus? Who knows for sure. Could have been Angus MacGyver for all I know. It's a nice label but irrelevant in the scheme of things, especially if the meat lacks an overall flavor palate to make it stand out. My biggest complaint, if you can call it that, was the fact that the bread was a little too big for the burger. Not brutally big, but a little oversized. Did I enjoy this burger? Yes, I did. Was it a bit off? Yes it was.

Mel's Burger Bar Slogan - OK?

So what do we do? On the one hand, there's an extensive burger menu with some interesting and unique offering and on the other there's a lack of meat flavoring that makes the burger stand out assuming you were to eat it on a plate (but who really does that?) If you like well done fries, Mel's has exactly what you are looking for - twice fried, done nice and hard.

Rating - 3.5/5 - If ranking just my burger experience it would have been a little lower but I am giving a half point bump for the shakes (though I didn't try one they did intrigue me so I'll venture back, ideally in the Fall) and sides.

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